Author: Randolph

Followers of the Smiters of Iniquity

For tax reasons, we will sell SOI-beans, which will be the same as Jelly Beans, but will have the Power of Virtuous Carbon (PVC) injected into each one. People can eat these in cinemas across the world, or simply use them as candles when the power goes out.

Dumbledore is not dead!

I've now decided on the new name of my religion, based on a suggestion by First Disciple Delano:

The NRO supports the slaughter of cows, sheep, pig and most other animals for the sake of human consumption. We like our meat, darn it! We however do not approve of human sacrifice, and strongly condemn any violence towards other humans, including rape and murder.

UPDATE: Please visit the official SOI website for the latest news of the new religious order I created.

I've had it with being politically correct. Today I read yet another news article identifying a rapist by his clothing only. This is probably the millionth time in the history of crime reporting this side of 1994, that journalism has not reported the facts for fear of racial stereotyping.

22 May 2006 is the official founding day of the New Religious Order, or NRO, so we have declared it a Holy Day. 22 May will now be known as Bliksem Day. Henceforth, all days will be in the new calendar dated from BS 1.

Since most other big religions have a list of banned things (including food, people and sexual preferences), I now present the NMC (Not Mostly-Carbon) List of the NRO: